How do we express real love? Week 2

"[Love] does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud."

If you have not yet read week 1, read it first!

Sometimes in life, we best learn what something is by learning what something is not. In this case, expressing love is one of those things. Love does not envy. Love does not boast. Love is not proud. I am certain that many times in my life, I have felt or have been any three of things. Heck, I've probably been all three at once.

In The Message bible, it is put this way: Love doesn't want what it doesn't have. Love doesn't strut. Doesn't have a swelled head. Is it making a little more sense? You could group these three characteristics as "self focused." A person who is always longing for the things they don't have (better relationship, more money, cuter guy, bigger house, etc), is letting everyone around him know how fantastic and successful he is, and spending his time thinking about himself and his accomplishments cannot be truly thinking of others and their needs; he's too preoccupied with thinking of himself!

We have to remember to keep selfish thoughts under control. Its ok to want things. God wants us to ask Him for these desires of the heart and wait on Him. Let's be careful not to let these wants take hold of our hearts at the expense of the ones we are working so hard to show love.

Maybe you won't want to put this in the comment section, but what areas in your life do you feel you might be selfish or self absorbed about? What are some things you think you can do to redirect that attention to the significant other in your life?

How do we express real love? Week 1

Today as I read 1 Corinthians 13 again, I kept one question in my head that I hoped to gain insight on. How do we express real love to others? Over the next several days, we are going to take apart and examine the different components of love as described in this verse and try to figure out how to best apply it in our own lives. Think of what an amazing life you would have if you had the best understanding of how to truly show others that you love them.

There are so many misconceptions on how to express love. Spending all your time with them, calling frequently, saying "I love you" enough times, providing things, sex, etc, are all pieces of a big messed up puzzle that we have all spent time trying to put together in are own lives.

The first two elements are probably the most familiar. Love is patient. Love is kind. Can an abstract concept like love actually be patient? Or could it be that this verse is secretly giving us instructions? Part of showing love to someone is being patient with them and showing them kindess. I don't know about you, but I get antsy when I have to wait longer than 7 minutes in line for anything. Patience is hard me and chances are, its hard for you too. If I love you, I work the hardest I can at being patient with you and if I'm not having a good day or week (or year) at it, that's ok because if you love me back, you'll be patient with me.

Kindess is something I find harder to define. For me it is easier say when something is not kind that figure out what is. The key here is not that love itself is a kind thing, but that the act of loving another must incorporate being kind. I find it interesting that sex does not fall into either of those categories.

In the next post we'll look at what it means for love to not have envy and to not boast. My open question for you readers: How are these concepts of love different from you may originally thought about love to be?

What is Love?

Love never gives up.
Love cares more for others than for self.

Love doesn't want what it doesn't have.
Love doesn't strut,
Doesn't have a swelled head,
Doesn't force itself on others,
Isn't always "me first,"
Doesn't fly off the handle,
Doesn't keep score of the sins of others,
Doesn't revel when others grovel,
Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
Puts up with anything,
Trusts God always,
Always looks for the best,
Never looks back,
But keeps going to the end.

The above is a contemporary translation of an excerpt from a letter written by the apostle Paul to a church in Corinth about a couple thousand years ago. I believe this to be the best working definition of all time for Love. The purpose of this blog is to help us all better understand the application of love. We'll explore at what love really is, how we apply it, how love is received, when bad things are said or done in the name of love, and how to respond to others around us in loving ways. I welcome feedback, comments, or stories from any and all readers who wish to share and will gladly link up to any who want to contribute anything at all.